Saturday, January 3, 2009

Shabbat morning parenting moment

This morning my dad dropped Craig and Justin off after shul, so the four of us had a mini musroom melt sandwiches for breakfast with a big jug of cocoa. Then Craig helped me load the dishwasher while his brothers put the leftovers away and then they all attacked the couch and put Mozart's Don Givanni in the DVD and just read and watched the opera till my dad came to pick Matt up and take him in for today's treatment.

Meanwhile I just got pretty distracted by Craig and Justin having a fight that escalated to some hair pulling and scratching, so both boys are in time out for now. A friend of mine remarked that a) she would feel sorry for the kids while they are being disciplined and b) some of these little fights are better to left unpunished as kids can determine the pack hierarchy through experiencing each other's strength.

I couldn't resist, but offer the blessing--or is it a course--that may her kid be surrounded by children of parents thinking similarly and supervised by teachers also thinking the same way. The reason? If you are right, then you'll be happy, if you are wrong, you'll learn it in time.

I am not legalizing fighting and agression between my kids by letting them sort it out for themselves. They can experience the limits of their strength and their brothers' when wrestling, pillow fighting or something along those lines. And disciplining each other is not the responsibility of my kids, but mine, as their parent.

Now as I have typed this up, it's time for lunch and time out for the boys is up.

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